GOOD LORD! Look what women have to put up with! NO WONDER there are so many lesbians!!!! Um...wait a minute, that's a bit emotional. Let me start again...I know a number of art students hang out on this site and I thought I'd post something just for them. My guess is that anatomical drawing teachers are pretty selective about what they teach. That's a pity. The day will come when students will need to draw the omitted item and they'll be totally unprepared! Well, worry not, Theory Corner is here to help! Get out your pencils and notebooks and get ready to take notes!
NEGLECTED ANATOMY LESSON #1
MALE BACK HAIR
Hmmm. Let's try to make some sense of this picture (above). It looks like the hair occurs in tufts. The pattern here is kind of mangy. It looks like a patch of moth-eaten buffalo skin that I found in an attic once. Amazingly the biggest tufts occur at the sides, near the bottom of the rib cage...what's that about? And looking closer I see the rib tufts seem to have sent out feelers to the shoulder tufts. Hmmm. Are the tips of the shoulders hairless? That's incredible!
Phew! Well that's enough with that picture!
Here's (above) a picture of a less mangy back. It looks like the hair is combed away from the spine. You don't suppose the guy's wife combs this stuff do you? And what are those little correction-tape notes? Why are the hairs in need of correction?
Notice that the neck is hairless. I assume that's because he cuts it. I mean surely nature wouldn't be so cruel as to just start the hair abruptly like it's a jacket he's wearing.
Man! Nature dealt this guy (above) a bad hand! Or maybe it didn't. I showed this to my daughter and asked her if she found it attractive. She of course said no (actually "Ew!" was the word) but then I asked if she'd feel the same way if she liked the guy. To my amazement she said something like, "Oh, well that's different. If I liked the guy the hair wouldn't matter." Isn't that interesting? I'll end this lesson on the comforting thought that a providence seems to take care of us males. Women are somehow prevented from realizing how ugly we men are. Isn't that wonderful?
Man! Nature dealt this guy (above) a bad hand! Or maybe it didn't. I showed this to my daughter and asked her if she found it attractive. She of course said no (actually "Ew!" was the word) but then I asked if she'd feel the same way if she liked the guy. To my amazement she said something like, "Oh, well that's different. If I liked the guy the hair wouldn't matter." Isn't that interesting? I'll end this lesson on the comforting thought that a providence seems to take care of us males. Women are somehow prevented from realizing how ugly we men are. Isn't that wonderful?
I'm not too familiar with the muscular anatomy, but does back hair flow with the contours of the back's musculature? If it does, then I think that would be a useful marker for artist attempting to draw back hair.
ReplyDeleteHey, where'd you get tht picture of me?!
ReplyDeleteNo, I'm kidding. My back hair comes in small isolated patches at the most.
By the way, Eddie: Guess what today is. B)
*shudder*
ReplyDeleteMale back hair is the evolutionary predecessor to the 'Cosby Sweater'.
ReplyDelete"Women are somehow prevented from realizing how ugly we men are. Isn't that wonderful?" Yes, it's one of life's little mercies.
ReplyDeleteThat is a whole lotta hair. More to love!
ReplyDelete...
Anyone around my age (32) will be aware of this album cover from The Pixies.
ReplyDeletehttp://quimby.gnus.org/4ad-pics/Pixies.ComeOnPilgrim.lp.jpg
This reminds me of this dude I knew in college. He was a bodybuilder and was the hairiest beast ive ever seen. Id go over to his place and watch and laugh as his roomate shaved is body hair with some clippers.
ReplyDeleteI have the shame of not being able to grow much hair, except on top of my head. I think that you back/chest hair people have all the real luck. I would shave designs and patterns into my chest hair, or sculpt a bowtie or bikini top out of chest hair. It has so much room for comedy that the hairiest people must also be the funniest as well.
ReplyDelete...Now get to WHOARFING!
ReplyDeleteYUCK!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI have enough hair on my front, but seem to lack hair on the back. I have a little on my neck and down the top ridge of my trapezius, then little bunches on each side down on my latissimus dorsi area, and some on above my sacrum. I wish I was either hairy, or hairless. To me, it looks quite odd.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I'm actually surprised there aren't more lesbians. Or why there are any gays at all. Us men are so freaking ugly.
ReplyDeleteWhen my dad started to just hang out with my mom, they went to the beach with her best friend.
ReplyDeleteMy dad pointed at a man with quite the patches of hair on his shoulders and quipped
"Look, that man has shoulder-brows *smirk*"
My moms best friend wasn't amused.
"That's my dad."
-------
There used to be this info-mercial on tv, with a guy with a hairy back, and they took the spay and went pshhhht! And they could just whipe it off with a towel.
I think they shouldn't use the spray for that, but as pepperspray in staid, so that when a guy attacks you, you can just go pshhhhht! and then later on, you can easily point him out. That's the one! The blind one with no eyebrows!
Oh and Phil, that cosby sweater joke is awesome! Glee!
ReplyDeleteSo tasty and so sexy! Like a grizzly bear!
ReplyDeleteUgh, what a scary pictures. Is this a real-life equivalent of the hairy lifeguard from "Naked Beach Frenzy"?
ReplyDeleteWomen just have low standards!
ReplyDeleteif you or someone you know has a hairy back there is salvation:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.mangroomer.com
hahaaah
Alouie: I don't think it does, at least it doesn't seem to in these examples.
ReplyDeleteDavid: Thanks for the reminder! Gee I miss Bob. If you want to see the Bob I (and several others here)knew look at "Bugs Bunny Superstar." That's the way he really looked and spoke in his final years.
Elliot: That's harsh!
Katz: Hmmm. Maybe you've got something there.
Cable: Haw! Good idea!
Hairy backs are good for covering up bad back tattoos
ReplyDeleteWhat is this world coming to? The lumberjack figure affiliated with 'Downy' paper towels is now clean shaven.
ReplyDelete