"Hi! Uncle Eddie here! Labor Day's coming up and I thought I'd post again about the best way to make a burger. The best burger I know of is John K's "Manly Cartoonist Burger." I put up the recipe way back in August of 2007.
Rather than print that all over again, I thought I'd discuss it side by side with Kenny Shopsin's burger theories. Shopsin wrote a cookbook that I'm perusing called "Eat Me," which features recipes from his famous New york restaurant. I thought you might find the contrast interesting."
"Um...a word of warning: burger theorists are feisty people. If John hears what he considers burger heresy, there's half a chance that he'll trash the place while I'm shooting."
"Okay, let's start! Well, to begin with, both cooks agree that you want ground beef that's 20-25% fat. Don't worry about the high fat content, it cooks away. John puts islands of chopped sirloin around the paddy so you get different flavor sensations with every bite, but the restaurant guy uses one type of meat overall.
John says add an egg (1 egg for 4 people), but don't compress the meat much when you put it in and never squeeze it, because that makes the cooking more difficult. It's good to have some air inside. A little pepper, chopped green onions, garlic, and chilli pepper, but never salt. Salt dries out the meat. If you want salt, add it after the burger's cooked."
"It's important to let the burger cook for five minutes undisturbed, except to turn it over at the midway point. You don't want to poke it more than necessary because that lets the juices escape."
"Uh-oh! Aaargh! This brings us to our first major disagreement."
Gulp! Gulp!
"Well, John passionately insists that burgers have to be cooked on hot charcoal, with a lid on half the time . The restaurant guy says no...it has to be on a really hot, pre-heated iron frying pan with a lid. Charcoal and frying pan: that difference defines the two types of people that exist in the universe. I hope these guys never meet because they'd probably kill each other."
"Anyway, after 5 minutes the restaurant guy relies sticks a meat thermometer right in the middle of the burger. 120 - 125 degrees for rare, 140 - 145 degrees for medium."
"Okay, that leaves one more subject...the bun!"
"John says you need a fresh pastry shop bun, something with sesame or poppy seeds. The book recommends Martin's Potato Buns, which you can probably get at the supermarket.
Mmmm, I gotta give it to John on this one. You can't beat a nice, fresh Kaiser roll. Besides, the restaurant guy owns a business and he's gotta be tempted to cut corners."
"You put a little butter on the roll to help it toast better, and something on top of it to press it down on the pan. You only toast it lightly so it's soft on the inside and crispy on the outside."
"Now the burger is assembled and spatulaed onto a plate. You take it over to stove where mushrooms have been cooking in bacon grease. Ladle some mushrooms and bacon on, then move to the condiment table, which contains Romaine lettuce, pickles, raw radishes, celery and fresh onions."
"Here we go with the controversy again. John prefers his onions raw and juicy. He says that's because you need to feel a little pain with your pleasure. He slices the onion only when it's ready for use.
The restaurant guy likes his thin sliced and fried in peanut oil til they're a gnarly brown/black that don't even look like onions anymore.
"And that's it. As I said, John's Manly Cartoonist burger is the best I've ever had. It even looks good! Even so, I'll try Shopsin's burger next time I'm in New york. All this reminds me that a good burger is a thing of beauty. It's not given to man to lay his eyes on a better Labor Day meal!'
"Bellisimo!"
P.S. At the supermarket where I usually score my Kaiser rolls, they tell me that Poppy seeds have been discontinued on rolls. Kali's Dad speculates that even though the seeds can't get you high, they can put something in your system that responds positively to drug tests.
P.P.S. Vincent Waller ate at Shopsin's and describes it in a comment.
P.P.P. S. I'M OFF FOR THE WEEKEND! 'BE BACK MONDAY NIGHT!
Raw onions all the way, man.
ReplyDeleteIf John had a BBQ and I was in LA, I'd try his burger. Seems to know what he's doing.
ReplyDeleteYou can't top charcoal for flavor when it comes to cooking meat. Another theory I recently tried involves putting a one half inch deep thumb indentation right in the center of the raw patty. Then cook undisturbed as you mention, flipping in the middle. As the burger cooks, it shrinks until the indentation seems to disappear, then the thing is done! It worked. It's like a regulator without having to stick a rectal thermometer into your meat.
ReplyDeleteSlobber, slobber. Lipsmack, lipsmack. Where do I get these burgers man! Do they come with a meat drink too? MEAT! MEEEAAATT!
ReplyDeleteOver here in the UK, burgers are seen as crap food you get in the freezer section. I see that we are wrong about that too! Mmmm, good article.
Paul.
Paul-
ReplyDeleteDon't you mean "grink"?
Whoa! wait a minute! Now, I'm pretty much the manliest guy around -- I have chest hair to rival the sideburns of an ape -- but I'm also a vegetarian! What kind of wild manly cartoonist burger can be made for me? Am I to be left out in the cold on cartoon barbecue day?
ReplyDeleteSure, the mushrooms sound great, but the bacon grease just isn't my bag. What do I do!?
cooking over charcoal is admittedly harder. for some reason i've found that cooking on a hot frying pan or griddle actually works better in some ways. the key is that it has to be SUPER HOT so that it cooks the outside faster..once the flip happens (5 minutes in sounds right) is when the burger is "sealed" all the juices are inside. This is where charcoal is different, the fat normally drips down into the fire/coals and then smokes up into the hamburger, a cool effect..but i've found cooking on skillet makes for a juicer burger because the fat is trapped inside.
ReplyDeleteAlso i was always against romaine lettuce on a hamburger. I think dark leafy greens and red meat don't really mix. it's like putting spinach on on a t-bone. I prefer iceberg because it is bland yet crunchy, the texture is better and it meshes better with classic burger ingredients. Sometimes it's not even necessary if you are making a bbq bacon cheese burger.
Cooking hamburgers is fun and it's all a matter of preference/practice.
I like to prepare the buns by first toasting them in the broiler with some sort of interesting cheese. Dill or jalapeno jack cheese are usually my favorite choices...sometimes Gouda or double Gloucester with chives. The broiler toasts the buns and melts the cheese at the same time. It's good to time things just right, so the buns are hot at the exact time the meat comes off the grill.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm with John on the raw onions!
Interesting theories. I've eaten at Shopsin's. It was great food but a very odd and interesting experience. It was a restaurant that was shoved into a ...if I remember correctly, a corner grocery store. It was cluttered and dusty. The booths didn't seem to fit, with 3 or 4 kids running around coloring in coloring books in whichever booth wasn't taken.
ReplyDeleteWith Mr.Shopsin's head staring out from the kitchen.
Yeah, if you cook your onions, you might as well leave it off the bun. My dad insisted on ordering a cheeseburger at a fancy pants french place once and they had a burger on a bun but covered in cheese sauce.
ReplyDeleteIt is odd to run into variations of how condiments are used. Even a place like Five Guys, a chain, might surprise you by chopping rather than slicing the onions. Or shredding cheese rather than chopping cheese, if you use cheese.
And John leans towards the meat additive school, which some frown upon. One of the best burgers I used to actually get regularly started as a meat based batter! The cheapskate would stretch his hamburger with bread crumbs and he had this porridge he would pour on a griddle like pancakes. But it ended up pretty tasty. If I had leaner meat, I would sometimes add worchestershire sauce and pan fry in butter. A local bar swore by a spice mix it added to its meat.
What is the egg to meat ratio in Johns recipe? It generally agrees with a lot of self proclaimed burger experts, in the type of meat and the handling and cooking. Egg can be an important binder however for hamburger chuck that may want to fall apart on you.
The best burgers in the world are the ones my dad grilled-on charcoal.
ReplyDeleteThe second-best burgers I've ever had, and ever will have, were the mama burgers and baby burgers at the A&W drive-up with the side trays when I was a toddler. They were in the mode of In'n'Out but much, much tastier.
I've never heard of Shropsin's or whatever it's called, huh! And I agree with David G--romaine is all wrong for burgers; iceberg lettuce IS best for the reasons he states.
I definitely come down on the charcoal side. With a burger or steak I'd say charcoal and a few flames.
ReplyDeleteThe charcoal should be natural and not briquettes, which are repackaged industrial waste. Here in L.A. if you shop at ethnic stores (biggest being FOOD 4 LESS) you can get bags of charred mesquite. Mexicans and Armenians favor them.
I hail from Chicago where we inherited the fine tradition of hickory smoking from the southern transplants. Out here you can usually get bags of hickory chips at the 99-cent store. Smoking is really too slow for burgers but they pick up some hickory taste if you throw some wet chips in. So does the chef.
Jenny: MAN! Summer nights we usedta drive out to the sticks and go to A&W. Remember the TEEN BURGER? It had bacon on it. The root beer was good, too. Remember looking up and seeing stars?
ReplyDeletethanks for the cooking tips, uncle Eddie. You're much better then my real jerk hole uncles.
ReplyDeletebtw I admire you for shamelessly showing off your knarly teeth, my teeth are a trainwreck.
the burgers were awesome, and they were huge!
ReplyDeleteI'm gonna make the Manly Cartoonist Burger, but those Canadian beer brands you suggested in a previous post aren't available where I live! Is there anything else that would fit? I hate American beer... I dunno. Heineken?
ReplyDeleteI should have photographed you having a Burgasm!
ReplyDeleteMy dad is pretty excited about the poppy seed thing, haha.
IDRC: you bet I remember their root beer and those glass mugs! They even made little bitty mugs for us wee punks (that is, if I'm not hallucinating it).
ReplyDeleteThe root beer was special-it tasted so rich, not anything like the canned version sold now. And I do remember the stars...also the vinyl smell of our Impala's backseat. There was definitely a magical aspect to being served at the car window.
FWIW My nostalgic lizard-memory also goes back to the ancient times when U. Eddie was too shy/modest to have his own visage on this blog. Haw! Times have changed. ; )
Jenny and IDRC: Has the taste of A&W, the root beer, the glass mugs, the teen burgers, etc... has that changed since your time? I still love A&W root beet in the frosted glass, and the burgers really are delicious, although I usually get the papa burger.
ReplyDeleteLast time I saw the inside (or outside) of an A&W was 25 years ago in southern Wisconsin. It wasn't a drive-in. No car window trays. I think I had a teen burger and a root beer. I can't remember it, so it couldn't have been too bad or too good. I somehow doubt if it's as good now as then, let alone 1965. The canned root beer is nowhere near the same thing as what they used to serve.
ReplyDeleteHmmm... According to Wikipedia, the Canadian A&W has nothing to do with the American A&W company anymore. Weird.
ReplyDeleteAre there a lot of A&W's where you guys are?
Jorge, here in California A&W sold [out] their drive up businesses decades ago.
ReplyDeleteAll that was left were some scattered franchises that continued to use the name, sell the root beer and I think some of the iconic "papaburgers" too, but I believe there was no longer a central method/recipe imposed (the way there is with McDonald's fries or an INnOut burger for instance, that ensures they all taste a certain way).
The last time I tried an A&W driveup--no more car service, but not a restaurant either--was 15 or more years ago on the West Side of L.A., and the food was just generic. Even the root beer wasn't what it should have been.
And it's true-the canned version isn't close to what the soda fountain one was, but then, any soda tastes totally different when it's actual fresh syrup mixed with CO2, to order.
It's possible that elsewhere in the US the A&Ws have survived better than they have here. It'd sure be nice to think so.
You guys should try it if you ever make it up to Canada. I think they actually use syrup to make the root beer. There's no car service, but there is a drive-thru and a restaurant. They have them in malls, too, where they don't give you the mug. They have the entire burger family, and all the commercials and packaging tout the retro credentials of A&W.
ReplyDeleteIt's really good, too.
When I was like 14 me and some of my friends tried to steal our mugs, but we were thwarted. I was scared to go into an A&W for years after that.