Haw! I haven't visited the People of Walmart site for a while because I thought it would have run out of gas by now. Boy, was I wrong! It's still going, just as strong as ever!
I swear, I've seen this very woman (above) in every city I've ever been in.
Ouch!
Double ouch! Man, that's nasty!
Zulu leg warmers and hot pants (above)!
Thanks for sharing that (above).
A weird Lawrence of Arabia look (above). Amazingly his posture conveys such dignity that he carries it off.
A man (above) with high standards.
Nice long hair (above) but it'll look better with another yard or so of length.
The fluorescent turquoise shampoo (above) or the hot pink? The huckleberry fire or the lavender surprise? Decisions, decisions.
It's okay. She's wearing underwear!
Ouch! Ooch!
Ooch! Ouch! Ooch!
Another woman (above) that I would swear I've seen everywhere I've lived!
Underwear outside the pants (above)! I used to see black guys do that in the mid 70s. Now it's a girls' thing.
A Walmart family!
This (above) is my favorite picture of the bunch. Casper pajamas, witch boots, a big old sedated leopard of a housecat, and....what's that in the square bag? I'll guess tampons or cat food, but it might be marshmallows or cheesewhiz.
I have a feeling that graphic (above) doesn't wash off.
I find these pics hilarious but horrifying. I have to keep reminding myself that these are the worst offenders culled from hundreds of Walmarts and that we are NOT infact plunging into a strange new dark ages (are we?!)
ReplyDeleteI just want to take my lawn chair, a beer, sit out the front and enjoy.
ReplyDeleteA guy at school described a tatoo/hair arrangement similar to the last pic, but it went even further - instead of simply generalizing where the bald patch is/will stay/grow larger, he had all of his hair dyed chloride green, buzz-cut to golf course-level evenness and then buzzed it right down to the scalp in several rows and then HALFWAY across close to the top, where the lawnmower guy was placed PRECISELY where it stops. This man must now maintain the look forever if he doesn't want to endure an equally elaborate process to get rid of it all.
ReplyDeleteAnd that's not even the best - Within the same conversation I heard of a woman who decided that her vagina looked a lot like Homer Simpson's bearded muzzle....so she had the rest of his face tattooed around it. I'm almost too timid to search for photographic evidence of this, and belive me, I have shamelessly enjoyed this blog's forays into the bizarre and risque MANY a time....
*NSFW!!!!*
ReplyDelete*Oh what the hell - here it is!
I saw a comment saying that it's fake, specifically that it "looks digital". I agree, actually. But it's a pretty good hoax, no? It's funny, if nothing else.
That site is a godsend, this is how I want to draw people not the hip impossibly beautiful ethereal anime characters and humorless superheroes that litter deviantart.
ReplyDeleteI think the woman in that 2nd pic looks like she stepped right out of Fellini's "8 1/2".
ReplyDeleteThe chick with the REALLY long blondish hair, it doesn't look like hair, it looks like hemp string. I almost want to make a macrame belt out of it.
ReplyDeleteFunny how they don't seem to wear anything Wal-Mart actually sells.
ReplyDeleteI'm more disturbed by the people that took these photos than with the people in them.
ReplyDeleteAnd that's all I got.
Joan Crawford is supposed to have said "I never go outside unless I look like Joan Crawford the movie star." These people have the opposite sort of philosophy from that.
ReplyDeleteI want to meet these people.
ReplyDelete@Lester Hunt - Nice job tying this post together with the last one!
ReplyDeletejesus, its frightning!-dont forget, every 4 years these people have a right to vote and decide our fate-explains a lot! is this really the new america?-the cherished homeland of the white picket fences and the fantasia like suburbs-is this what the republicans and sarah palin are squacking about? yes- it needs to saved...FROM ITSELF!
ReplyDeleteUncle Eddie, you're going to get hit with a wet spaghetti noodle with this post! :D
ReplyDeleteIt does seem like a good bit of Walmart shoppers create the most fashion crimes.
And you know that everyone of those woman said, "Honey, do I look good in this?" And Honey said, "Absolutely." Because he knew better than to tell the truth.
ReplyDeleteHey, Eddie!
ReplyDeleteI love your idea of a Theory Corner Store! Soon I will know where to go for all my funny toupee and itching powder needs!
Pete: Holy Cow! You're right! Maybe that's why I remembered seeing that woman before! BTW, that's a great film, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteJenny: Really? How come?
Lester: It IS the opposite of what Crawford did! we need Joan to go in there and kick some butt!
Actually, the store's much bigger than that. I have big plans for it. If it doesn't succeed, it'll still have been a lot of fun for me. I figure it'll open in about a month.
zoran: That was HILARIOUS!
ReplyDeleteHOLY COW!! So funny!! I can't stop laughing!!! The guy with the lawnmower tattoo on his head is killer! What the hell is with Wal-Mart??! I've got one by me that I'd swear is populated by refugees from the island of Dr. Moreau. Six years ago, I was nearly mauled by a door greeter who freaked when I unwittingly walked in through one of the exit doors. What a freak show! If you watch people competing for bargains, you'd think you'd gone back in time to Vietnam in '68! As for the first picture: Jungle Boy should know better than to kill a pink cheetah, wear its skin, & pick his ass in public.
ReplyDeleteWalmart: small prices comes with small amounts of dignity. (and no shame)
ReplyDelete