Tuesday, November 21, 2006
COMPUTERIZED SOCKS
Sometimes I have trouble using my %$&#@ computer. Fortunately I have a techie daughter who answers my questions but I can see the thought balloon above her head which reads, "Why does my dad have so much trouble with this stuff? What's wrong with his generation? Why are they all so dense?" Consulting my crystal ball I can see where all this is leading...
PUTTING ON SOCKS IN THE YEAR 2150
Dad: Help! Daughter, you gotta help me! I can't put on my socks! They won't let my feet in!
Daughter: (rolls eyes up) Well, maybe you didn't enable them!
Dad: Enable? What's that?
Daughter: (rolls eyes way up) You know, enable them! You have to activate the program!
Dad: What program? I just want to put on my socks.
Daughter: (rolling up eyes again, can't believe how stupid her dad is) Here, let me do it (she punches a code into the sock)! Here!
Dad: I still can't put it on!
Daughter: Well, maybe you need a new driver!
Dad: How do I get that?
Daughter: Dad, if you'd taken that community college course in socks I told you about you wouldn't have to bother me with questions.
Dad: I shouldn't have to take a course to put on a pair of socks! When I was a kid eveything was so simple!
Daughter: When you were a kid socks didn't tell you the weather.
Dad: I don't want socks to tell me the weather!
Daughter: (exasperrated) Here, take this book: "Putting on Socks for Complete Dummies." It's only 300 pages and comes with a CD ROM. And here's the name of an online sock message board. You'll get the hang of it yet!
Dad: (Groan!)
hahahahaha! i'm one of those "techie" kids as well, helping out my parents from the pre-PC age. i'm so picturing myself in the future trying to put on my future socks!
ReplyDeletegreat post.
This is great!
ReplyDeleteI especially love how in the year 2150 socks need to be enabled to be worn- and on top of that, you have to read a book that comes with a "cd-rom" instructional manual. Aren't cd-roms already passè?
This is how I feel as a traditional animator working on computers. "I want it to squash." "Well, did you rig squash deformers blah blah blah." I have since given up Maya.
ReplyDeleteDon't take my path Eddie! And keep posting drawings and talk about Delsarte. Stick it to computers by championing the pencil!
Ha. This post made me laugh. I already can't play video games. I had no idea how my parents couldn't figure out how to play Super Mario Brothers. As soon as I had kids, I lost the ability to figure them out. Now I am my parents.
ReplyDeleteHere's where you're going wrong:-
ReplyDelete1) You've got your imac on your feet
2) You're wearing your ipod as a fez
Call our technical help-line for further assistance.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! :D Brilliant! Actually, automatic dressing will probably happen in the future.
ReplyDeleteI completely sympathize with your daughter. When my mother first got a PC about 8 years ago, she would call my house constantly for help. Sometimes, I would have to go to my parents' house to help her just because she was calling me all the time. I'm not exaggerating - one day she called me 7 times within one hour..
Fast forward to now - she now uses a laptop and she's a natural at computers! She uses the laptop to create print media (calendars, flyers, menus) for the retirement community where she does volunteer work (I wish I inherited her artistic talent...). The retirement community thinks that she's so computer savvy.
Moral of the story:
don't get too frustrated with the machine yet, Uncle Eddie. You'll get the knack of it, and everyone will think that you're the computer wizard.
P.S. - Kali's right - CD-ROMs are so last season in computers. Right now, the distribution media is DVD-ROM or a download from the Internet. The future will probably have all the media (book, drivers, et. al) on a small key fob where you press the button and a hologram appears to do all the work for you.
...and then there'll be the shoes to deal with next! (You'll no doubt need more RAM.)
ReplyDeleteHAPPY THANKSGIVING to the Fitzgeralds and all our blogging buddies!
this is why animators should stick to drawing
ReplyDeleteIn the future all digital media will emanate from a chip living in Tim Sarnoff's ass.
ReplyDeleteI want to lynch the guy who invented DVD menus.
ReplyDeleteUgh so true.
ReplyDeletei feel so sorry for your daughter, Eddie! I have troubles with my parents and computers too. My dad has a bad aura that crashes every computer he comes near, and my mom, a windows user since version 3.1, can't grasp the concept of windows!! If one window is opened on top of the other, she thinks the one that's not visible has gone away forever!!
ReplyDeleteYO EDDIE:
ReplyDeleteThis'll sound kinda annoying, and I'm sure yer kinda busy. But can you take a look at my blog, and tell me if it's worth keeping up there?
Or anyone else for that matter. Your opinion/s count/s.