Saturday, June 24, 2006
TRYING TO MAKE SENSE OF MY MEDICAL PROBLEMS
First let me describe what happened. I get the eye surgery and it turned out better than I expected. A few hours after the operation I lifted the patch and was amazed to see how clear everything was, clear and very, very clean. I had no idea that the world was such a incredibly clean place. You could eat off sidewalks like these! I went to sleep happy as a bug.
The next morning I wake up with a pain in the abdomen. I go to pee and nothing comes out. I try to pick something up and I can't. Just about everything I did hurt like crazy. Things get worse and worse til I end up in the emergency room of the local hospital. They speculate that the anasthesia I just had was responsible. They jam (and I do mean "jam") a catheter in ( a memorable experience) and the pee comes out like it was shot out of a firehose. I had to wear that stupid catheter and carry around a bag for a week. Well, it turns out that I get a bladder infection from the catheter and then, on top of that.....I'm going to stop here because I've probably already exceeded my gross limit. Anyway, I experienced more pain in the last two weeks than all the pain I've felt in a whole lifetime before that. I also discovered that pain sucks.
This has been such a bad experience that it's actually changed my philosophy. I used to think nature was all about fuzzy little ducklings and beautiful, forest waterfalls. I used think of nature as my friend. Now I think of it as a masked assassin hiding in the bushes with a knife. In my darkest moments I hear it saying, "Are you still here?"
I'm amazed at how little comfort people in pain can take from secular philosophy. Epictitusis is helpful but you have to change your whole life to make his ideas work. Modern philosophers are more interested in problems like "being" and what the order of words in a sentense tells us. Has philosophy ever been more irrelevant to the problems of real people than it is now?
Modern Christianity puts so much emphasis on God being love that it finds people in pain to be an embarrassment. When my dad was a kid everybody believed that love was only one aspect of God and that he was also a stern taskmaster who put us on Earth to test us. Pain fit into my dad's concept of the universe a lot better than it fits into ours.
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That was an awesome post, very thoughtful. Sometimes people forget that suffering is as a part of life as bliss is.
Wow. You were going through all this and STILL you were keeping up with your blog?!?!?! No wonder folks like you so much!
Re: God/Comfort/Pain/Love, etc. Read the book of Job, my friend. Or at least listen to the appropriate "William Shatner Reads The King James Version Of The Bible in Esperanto" audio cassette.
Best wishes, of course, for your recovery...
Sounds like a very, urm, unpleasant time you've been having Uncle Eddie. I hope your medical issues will be resolved in no time.
The world needs more people who think that "nature [is] all about fuzzy little ducklings and beautiful, forest waterfalls."
You had trouble going #1? Not to scare you but Elvis died because he had problems going #2. I hope you don't have that problem on top of things.
Get well soon. Remember, Tex Avery went through his entire career with only one working eye. Keep on doodlin'. B)
Not only that but I heard Tex Avery also got a bladder infection from not leaving his drawing table for several days....I'm not sure if that's true or not but as an animator I can relate to that sort of mantality.
P.S. pain sucks...
Wow, you hit that right on the money Eddie.
As I get older I have found that it is mostly about pain. how much you can stand before you snap?
Hence the term grumpy old etc. etc. I really enjoyed this post thanks!
and drink cranberry juice keeps the ppeing clean!
Hi Eddie,
Thanks for the honest post. A book that I found helped me with the struggle of/with pain is C.S. Lewis' book "The Problem of Pain". Hope you get well soon.
Hey--that guy swiped my recommendation! Oh, well...I too suggest "The Problem of Pain". It's C. S. Lewis and before you balk(assuming you will)remember HE was vastly influenced by hedonistic catholic genius & crackers-in-bed slob G.K. Chesterton, and who can't love Chesterton?
It won't make pain disappear but he writes well and has some interesting ruminations about "why?! aargh!".
You know, women get much the short end of the lollipop in this old world but I'm telling you, there are some benefits beyond measure, like NO catheters ever! SO awful! I send much voodoo/magic/prayers/good thoughts your way! Feel better soon!
Everybody: Thanks much, and thanks also for enduring my pathetic whining. Lots of people have it much worse than I do. What about people with migraines? That must be horrible!
My problem is that I've been fairly healthy up til now and I'm just not used to this sort of thing. Up till a year ago my medicine cabinet held mostly aspirin and a bunch of greasy hair-conditioning samples. At least now I have a fine collection of real adult pills and don't have to have pill envy anymore.
I can't help but notice that pain is often tied to the time of day. You can have a really bad patch for a few hours then spend the next couple of hours thumbing through the National Enquirer. I have new respect for that magazine..Oops! Gotta go!
Eddie.
Poor Eddie! I hope you get better soon. You should save your catheter so I can beat it up when you're done with it. I'll show it a thing or two!
geez eddie that sounds super shitty. i hope you recuperate well & fast
Not being able to go is probably one of the worst pains in the world!
You are such a lil' trooper!
I hope you can get a break! That sounds just awful.
On the subject of modern Christianity, it really disappoints me. I'm with the train of thought your dad grew up with; I was taught the same thing.
I know little about the masters' philosophy and even less about modern musings, but as far as the latter, I absolutely cannot stand what I have heard and read. To me, it's a bunch of mushy-headedness about as deep and profound as, say, a Rob Schneider film.
Keep the National Enquirers close by and feel better soon!
Hi-that was me recc'ing Chesterton--I guess I wasn't signed in...I thought I was. Oh, well--
Migraine is terrible, but it ain't cancer--it doesn't endanger your life or kill or maim you, thank goodness. There are much worse things...what little I've learned about pain is that it sort of drives you nuts at its most intense...I've known people with chronic back pain, etc. and I think they have it bad, plus it's invisible--and also, it's sort of a fear of the unknown: "how far is this going to go? How much worse can it get? How much more can I stand?". When pain is unrelenting, you begin--just begin, mind you--to have an inkling of an understanding of why suffering people are described as "ready to let go", i.e., die...but I'm being morbid, sorry! : )
What you, me & our ilk is in, far far from grim death gargling at us from every cornerr(plagiarising Sturges), is above all the indomitable will to live, no matter what. If you can put up with that bag, you can deal with everything--not getting a parking space, the line at the bank, the struggle to pay bills...mean drivers(that's a BIG thing in L.A., wouldn't you say?). I guess what I mean is--you're vetted now! I'll bet you can stomp anything.
I'd also take Katie up on her offer--take the thing to a shooting range and let em fly!
As always--feel better!
Chesterton will do you good whether you're feeling well or ill. He is one of my all time favorite people ever to have walked the earth.
Also, Eddie, I hope you get to feeling better mighty quick. You're getting to be one of my other favorite people.
Sometimes normally healthy people can go through rough stretches and things like this just happened.
I had to drop out of college for a semester due to compound illnesses that struck at the worst possible time.
Just roll with it.
Here is my submission for the guest spot in your theory chair. I figured all you've been through has primed you for exposure to such rank amateurism.
Again, best wishes for a speed recovery...
Hang in there Eddie, there's at least 30 more C.G.I Animated films with talking animals coming up that will unblock any problems you may be having in the trouser department.
Hi Uncle Eddie,
I have a theory that I find comforting in times of tribulation: It is that the concepts of God & heaven, indeed all forms of pleasure, are creations of the one true diety, the Devil.
They are intended to lull us into a false sense of security, making his inevitable, eternal torture of our lowly meat-puppet souls all the more enjoyable for him.
Hope that helps... :)
As always, my prayers for your speedy recovery are with you.
Sapienta Arma Dedit,
- Wil
You'll be better soon, Eddie. Drink plenty of water.
Get well soon. Remember, Tex Avery went through his entire career with only one working eye. Keep on doodlin'. B)
I thought of more examples to add to this sentiment:
Lloyd Turner made it through an entire animation career and TV writing career with only one arm.
Vincent Van Gogh painted some marvelous painting with only one ear.
Adolf Hitler supervised an entire Reich with only one testicle.
See? Don't let this setback of yours keep you from doing what you love. :)
Thank the lord you didn't wake up & lift the eyepatch to discover they'd made you a CYCLOPS!
David Germain:
And just what happened to Lloyd Turner's missing arm, Hitler's gone gonad and Van Gogh's chopped off ear? Listen, I'm thinkin' there's a TV series in this! Not for American TV, that's a lost cause, but take it to some happenin' country and you'll be rich and famous, though paid in the local currenty, which is probably made out of mud.
Current TV focus test groups want their animated leads to be 'aspirational characters' (a made-up word to suit their purpose of getting paid). Well, what could be more 'aspirational' than disparate hacked off body parts, itching to form an exciting new whole? I'm tellin' ya, you're sitting on a potential gold mine! And you should pay Eddie a healthy cut for causing you to come up with such a terrific concept! The man needs it to fix his bladder, thanks to God, who gave us C.S. Lewis and quack doctors.
Steve Christ
Oh, Eddie, I'm sorry about your ordeal. *hugs*
I'm really impressed that you were still able to keep up with your blog through all this.
Get well soon!
But then you die, as does everyone else, So what'd the point? How can you be hpapy knowing everything is pointless? Do you jsut ignore it?
Why do you say life is pointless if there's no afterlife? Let's look at it on a smaller scale. There's a saying that i find to be true in that you can't be friends with someone without influencing them in someway and them influencing you.
As you go through your life, you can make your mark on those around you. You can live to your utmost potential. If you work hard, you can leave a legacy or influence those who come after you. Would you call any of this pointless? I certainly don't.
Oh and being an agnostic doesn't mean not believing in an afterlife, it just means you don't believe in organized religion. :)
Oh and being an agnostic doesn't mean not believing in an afterlife, it just means you don't believe in organized religion. :)
Stephen Colbert said "an agnostic is an athiest without balls." >D
One of the many reasons his show rules. B)
ooh, catheters! major condolences Eddy. hope you feel better!
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