MORE ABOUT THE GOLDEN AGE OF NEWSPAPER COMICS

Some of what I have to say here I've said before, but great truths bear repeating. Besides, this gives me an excuse to put up some killer drawings. All the artwork is from the period 1900-1910, my favorite decade for newspaper comics. Opper (above) did some of his best work then, and so did Herriman, Goldberg, F. W. Marriner, and Fenninger.

Some modern comics fans don't like Opper because they think his drawing style was primitive. That's an odd thing to say. Compared to what's around now (above), Opper was Michelangelo.

Besides, Opper was an important influence on artists like F. W. Marriner (above) who were indisputably killer draftsmen. How do you like Marriner's sketch of the teacher above?

  The pre-Krazy Kat Herriman (above) flourished during this time. Why Herriman ever did Krazy Kat, I'll never know. It was a come-down for him.

Above, more Herriman. What a guy!

I wish I'd copied down the name of this strip (above) and the artist. Who drew it? Was it one of the Felix artists, Sullivan or Messmer? You can see how newspaper strips influenced animated cartoons. You can also see the Opper influence.

 I love the weird, slapstick stories in the old newspaper strips. Here's one (above) of a vengeful goat who sells who sells his enemy's babies to a wandering Italian guy. The mother sees what's going on and delivers a big bear bite to the guy's side. 

Once again, you can see the Opper influence. 

I'm amazed that American newspapers were able to lure fine German artists like Lionel Fenninger (above) over here (actually Fenninger had a complicated lineage...see Norman's comment on this in the comments section). Germany had a wonderful crop of funny artists in this period, and we managed to bring a lot of them over here. 

Maybe that brain drain was catastrophic for Germany. For comparison, imagine that another country like Japan managed to lure away all our great jazz musicians at the start of the Jazz Age. Imagine that China had lured away Elvis and Chuck Berry, and all the great Rock and Roll musicians when Rock and Roll was just starting. 

Then again, Germany was in a mood to be serious in those times. If the funny artists stayed home they might have been ineffectual.

Milt Gross (above) was, of course, from the 30s. I include him here because he carried the cartoony, slapstick, anything-for-a-gag sensibility of the 1910s right into his own era, and he made it work. Don Martin had a lot of that sensibility. 

Current newspaper cartoons are too introverted, too smug, too tiny, too politically correct. I wish they were more outgoing, more...more noisy.

BTW, most of the pictures here are from Allan Holtz's superb blog, "Stripper's Guide," link in the sidebar.

Holy Cow! Where is everybody!? I think I'll take advantage of the lull to give myself a little vacation. I'll be back Wednesday, Oct.6! See ya then!

WALKER DUKES: GENIUS!

Several people asked me who did the over-the-top, colorful photos of the spacewomen in the Pizza Boy episodes.  Good question, and here's the answer...Walker Dukes. The man is a genius! 

He likes to take black and white frame grabs from classic films and color them. How do you like this one (above) of Joan Crawford? He also does portrait photography in this style. I wish I could afford him. 

He's terrific at graphics and film titles (above). Rainbow lions is (are?) a terrific idea!

Electro Dog House (above)...very nice. 

I love his color choices. Sometimes anything that's not day-glow has no place on his palette...and rightly so! I wonder how a poster of this statue (above) would look in black light?

Well, maybe he does use more subdued colors sometimes. I really like what he did with the color and texture of these rocks (above).

Here's the man himself (above)! Check out his work here:


http://www.flickriver.com/photos/20connectedbreaths/random/


 

PIZZA BOY (PART V) (REVISED)

EXT. SPOOKY OLD HOUSE, NIGHT:

GREAT LEADER (V.O.): "Are the shades down? The doors locked?"

ALIENS (V.O.): "Yes, Great Leader! Only the initiated can hear your transmission!"

INT. HOUSE: Aliens are gathered to listen to The Great Leader on TV.

GREAT LEADER: "Good! I can't emphasize enough the need for security."

Pizza Boy listens.

GREAT LEADER: "As you know, the invasion of Earth begins tomorrow. I assume you all have your orders."

ALIEN (V.O.): "Yes, Great Leader! Everyone knows who he's supposed to vaporize when the signal is given!" 

ALIEN KID: "Look Dad! The Great Leader is just a big old eyeball!"

The Great Leader zaps the kid.

"

THE GREAT LEADER: "Now let's get down to business. Are the gorillas ready to be unleashed?"

GORILLA TRAINER: "Yes, Great Leader! When you say the word a half million angry gorillas will be released in population centers all over the world."

THE GREAT LEADER (V.O.): "Good!"

GREAT LEADER (V.O.): "And the ball bearings? Are they ready to roll?"

SALUTING ALIEN: "Yes, Great Leader. At your command steel balls fifty feet high will be rolled down the streets of every village and town."

GREAT LEADER: "And the Lesbians? How about them?" 

LESBIANS: "They're ready, Great Leader!"

LESBIANS (V.O.): "On the signal the Amazon Army will attack New York City, taking care not to disrupt the various feminist bookstores and craft fairs."

GREAT LEADER (V.O.): "And the Shamwows!? What about the Shamwows?"


SHAMWOW SALESMAN: "A million Venusian face eaters have been sold to American housewives under the brand name, 'Shamwow.' When the command is given the Shamwows will revert to type and voraciously consume human faces."

GREAT LEADER: "Excellent! And the zombie dogs?"

GREAT LEADER (V.O.): "Never mind! I can see they're ready!"

GREAT LEADER: "Then that's it! The invasion will commence tomorrow! Victory is inevitable!"

APPLAUSE LIGHT GOES ON.

Aliens...enthusiastic applause.


ALIENS (CHANTING): "Victory to The Great Leader! Victory to the Great Leader! Victory to the Great Leader!!!!"

PIZZA BOY: "Yeah...er...victory and all that. Yessir!"

PIZZA BOY: "Now how do I collect for the pizza?"  



STORY CONTINUES IN PART VI, WHICH FOLLOWS......

PIZZA BOY (PART VI) (REVISED)

On frustrated Pizza Boy. The room is chanting and it's beginning to look like he'll never collect on the pizza.

PIZZA BOY: (GASP!!!)

PIZZA BOY: "Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Baaaad kitty! How do you expect to grow up to be a full-blown cat if you smoke those things?"

He picks up the cat.

PIZZA BOY: I think you outta give me those cigarettes. What do you think?"

ANGRY KITTEN (ACTUALLY AN ALIEN KITTEN): "I think if you don't put me down right now, I'm gonna bite your nose off!"

The kitten bites him and runs away.

PIZZA BOY: "(Big cry of pain)

The Great Leader perks up!

GREAT LEADER: "WHO SAID THAT!!!!???????"

PIZZA BOY: "Er...I guess it was me. Sorry about that!"

PIZZA BOY: "And while I have your attention...I'm the pizza delivery boy! I'm here to deliver Delicious Goodness, The Food of the Gods!!! Eleven big ones, whaddaya say!?"

PIZZA BOY (WHISPERING): "I think the pie's kinda cold now, so I'll knock off a couple of bucks."

GREAT LEADER: "Wha...? How did he...? Who....? Kill him!!!! KILL HIIIIIIMMMMM!!!!!!!

ALIEN PRINCESS: "Too bad, Pizza Boy! I was beginning to like you!"

The princess leaps to her feet and fires a laser pistol at Pizza Boy. Every alien in the room does the same thing.

;

PIZZA BOY: "Be careful! You'll harm the pizza!"

Faithful to his duty to protect the precious pizza, the valiant delivery boy runs out of the house, all the time ducking heat rays.

GREAT LEADER: "If he gets away and alerts the authorities, our whole plan will unravel!  Get him!"

The Great Leader detaches from the TV.

THE GREAT LEADER: "I'm taking personal charge now! Everybody outside! He can't be far!"

EXT., THE GROUNDS AROUND THE HOUSE:

ALIENS: "He could be anywhere! How do we find him!?"

THE GREAT LEADER: "You can't...but the zombies can. UNLEASH THE ZOMBIES!!!!!!"

ON THE HOUSE: Heavy steel doors are pulled apart and thousands of hungry zombies spill out into the street.

THE GREAT LEADER: "And just to be doubley sure....ROLL OUT THE SECRET WEAPON!!!"

INT. HOUSE: (SFX: FURIOUS POUNDING) Some one or some thing is pounding on the other side of a locked door. Frightened aliens cautiously open the locks then run away as the rusty chains slide to the floor.

GREAT LEADER (V.O.): "I almost feel sorry for the pizza creature....!"

GREAT LEADER: ".....almost...but not quite!!!!!!!" Bwahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!

GREAT LEADER (CONT): "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

GREAT LEADER (CONT): "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


INTENSE!!!??? You ain't seen nothin' yet! Is this the end for our hero? What on Earth is "The Secret Weapon?" And how can Pizza Boy hope to survive against these overwhelming odds?????? Find out in the next thrilling episode of....

****************************PIZZA BOY!****************************