MY DINNER WITH MIKE

Er...change that to read, "My LUNCH With Mike." I didn't get any photos of Mike because he wouldn't co-operate.

Anyway, the lunch was this Saturday and we both had a recent acquisition to show. Mike brought a totem pole he just got off the net. Nifty, isn't it? It's hard to get a good totem pole for anything less than a king's ransom. He also brought the rubber chicken that used to be on top of his refrigerator. He said it was mine if I wanted it because he's had it for ten years now and it's all dry and cracked. For a moment the thought crossed my mind that it might make a good Mother's Day present but I thought better of it.

Oddly enough, the rubber chicken attracted a few people to our table, including a guy dressed in a pricey black body suit and black cap. He looked like an agent of Spectre. When he left I remarked to Mike that he dressed like someone famous, someone very Beverly Hills. Mike said I missed the Ralph's Supermarket emblem on his shoulder. Mike recognized him as the guy who stacks the produce. That's how they all dress there. Holy Cow! Ralph's employees get to look like secret agents!

Mike also showed me his new slapstick. I had no idea what it was. It turns out that it's what clowns used to hit each other with. It's a paddle that makes a big "Whack!" noise without really hurting anyone. It's where the term "slapstick comedy" came from. 

For my part of the Show and Tell I brought out the dainty black hand I just bought for a few bucks at the local craft store. I told Mike I was thinking of buying a few and giving them out as Theory Corner awards in a ceremony celebrating excellence in student comedic animation.

The fingers would hold a picture of the world's funniest man, Percy Dovetonsils (above), and that would give the name to the award: The Golden Percy. I thought it was a great idea but the whole thing mystified Mike. He wanted to know why I was calling it "Golden." It's black so it ought to be called "The Black Percy." He suggested that I have other awards called "The Hairy Percy" and "The Shaved Percy." 

Yikes! I didn't realize.....honestly, I....well, now I can't call it a Percy anymore.

BTW: The book I'm reading in the photo at the top is by R. L. Stine, a popular author of horror novels for eleven and twelve year-olds. I've never read anything he's written but the library put some of his books in the give-away bin and I thought I'd try one. Does anybody here have an opinion about this guy?

THE NEXT STEP IN CANINE EVOLUTION

I'll start with two questions: the first, will dogs of the future fly? Yes of course they will. They already fly if you count travel in airplanes. Geez, dogs have even been in space. When the day comes that humans fly around in jet packs, you can bet that dogs will tag along in jet packs of their own.

The second question: what will dogs of the future look like? No problemo, that's easy to answer. They'll look like us. Lots of them (below) already do.

You probably think I'm kidding, but I'm not.

When I was a kid lots of dogs still looked like modified wolves (above). Not any more.

Most modern breeds (above) look like teddy bears. They're fluffy little things.

But that's not the only change I've seen. Modern dogs love to kiss. When I was a kid dogs kissed less frequently, only when the dog decided we deserved it.  Now dogs are effusive. Even when in pain they want to kiss their masters. They're obsessed with it.

Amazingly, humans kiss the dogs back!!!! If I'd done that when I was a kid my Dad would have freaked out. I can hear him now: "What's the matter with you? Don't you know where that tongue has been?" The thought of that would have been deterrent enough.

It's common nowadays to walk into a room and find humans and dogs kissing on the mouth.  It's embarrassing! I feel like asking the couple if they'd prefer to be alone.

But I said I said I was going to speculate on the next step in dog evolution. Brace yourself, because this is creepy. The next step is...are you ready?..... human expressions. Dogs get more expressive every day. Look at the way that dog above is looking thoughtfully at something offscreen.

Decades ago dogs (above) had the basic doggie emotions: happy, sad, eager, angry...stuff like that. Now you see emotions like arch, whimsical, bemused, and puzzled. Yikes! Dog breeders must be doing that!

Whether or not the dog (above) really feels those complex emotions is something only the dog knows. All I know is they increasingly have the appearance of having them.

It's disturbing. I want to be the only one in my house who's bemused. I don't want my parakeet or goldfish to look like they're wrestling with the great questions of philosophy. That's MY job!

BTW: Here's an interesting link on a similar subject from Roberto Severino:

http://dogbehaviorscience.wordpress.com/2012/09/29/100-years-of-breed-improvement/

COURSERA'S COURSE ON GREEK MYTHOLOGY (REVISED)

N C Wyeth did a good job on the Odyssey. I wonder why none of the translations I've seen use these pictures?

These are oil paintings, approximately 4' X 3'.

Anyway, what I really want to talk about is Coursera's currently offered course in Greek and Roman Mythology.

For those who are unfamiliar with it, a word about Coursera....

Coursera provides free college-level courses on the internet. You can audit the courses by simply watching the videos, or you can participate at a higher level by reading the assigned texts, taking tests, writing papers graded mostly by peers, and participating in class discussion on the net.

The only fee is optional...if you pass the course you might want to pay $30 or so for a certificate verifying that fact. Selected courses are accepted for full credit by over 2,000 American colleges. You can drop out at any time and the drop won't be held against you. Records are only kept on courses the student has successfully completed. And it's all free, did I mention that?

I know what you're thinking, that no internet course can compete with live teaching. My answer to that is...well, of course not. There's obviously no substitute for live give and take and for the role model offered by a gifted teacher. This is for people who can't do that, or who want to audit a difficult course like calculus before taking it again for credit in a live class.



My family (minus me) is taking Peter Struck's 10 week course on Greek and Roman mythology right now, and they're loving it. This morning they were telling me about the way different critics interpreted the The Odyssey through the ages. A classical Greek critic interpreted it as an allegory of the way the gods work on us through different parts and artifacts of the body like bile or the spleen. Hume thought the book was nonsense and ought to be forgotten. Heine (the 19th Century romantic) thought the story was a door into what would later be called the subconscious. Fascinating!

Here's (below) the reading list for the class.

I didn't take the course because only Homer and Virgil and possibly Hesiod really interest me, but Struck looks like a good teacher and it might have been fun to see what he had to say about the others.



There's an introduction to English Common Law course coming up that I have my eye on. It's an odd subject for a cartoonist to take, and I have no intention of ever being a lawyer, but I love the parts I've read of Blackstone's commentaries, and I'm curious to know more. Besides, if the class doesn't keep my interest I can drop it, with no penalty.

BTW: Struck is using the Fagles translation of The Odyssey, which he defended on a video. Some of the students pushed for the newer Lombardo version. See what you think...

 

BRING BACK 'THE CRISIS MEETING!"

No wonder Vaudevillians made so much progress in such a short time; they believed in holding crisis meetings. When an act failed to get a "wow" response, the troupe held a crisis meeting the moment the curtain came down. The agenda: "What did we do wrong!?"

These were serious meetings. Everyone knew that some other act was backstage with the theater owner at that very moment saying, "Did you see how nobody laughed at that last act? They obviously don't know what they're doing, and it's costing YOU money. Now, if you had put US in there..." The troupe felt it's very survival was at stake. They tried to isolate what the problem was and fix it then and there. That's a formula for progress. 

That's what modern animation needs...crisis meetings. We need a producer who is personally offended when another studio or another unit seems to be doing something better than his own.

I'm often amazed when companies don't take competition seriously. They're always ready with an excuse if the TV show or movie doesn't grab the public. Not enough people face the fact that shows fail because they're just not entertaining.

Bosses should get mad more often. The boss gave us all work in the belief that he would get a decent return on his investment. He's entitled to a righteous rant. Seriously, we should be ashamed if we don't deliver the goods. 

MY SECOND MOST MEMORABLE DEBATE (REVISED)

I know what you're thinking: "So what's with the picture of the girl?"  Well, I'm getting to that. 

Years ago I had a not-very-serious traffic accident (not my fault!) involving a luxury car driven by a drop-dead gorgeous girl. She looked like the young Angelina Jolie...in fact, maybe she WAS the young Angelina Jolie, I don't know.

Anyway, we got to talking while we were exchanging insurance information and it turned out she belonged to some kind of New Age crystal religion (I love LA for attracting people like that) and in her religion someone like me is considered to be an, um, advanced man...the (Ahem!) next evolution, so to speak. Was it my buck teeth? Something I said? I don't know, but she felt she had to do something for me to make up for inconveniencing an advanced being like myself.  She said she would do anything, absolutely anything.

Well, it happened that I was due to stage a debate for my kid's third or fourth grade class on the subject of whether "Riki-Tiki-Tavi" (actually a different book with a similar name) was really a good book or not, and I needed someone to debate. I asked if she would do it and she enthusiastically agreed.  When I got home I sent her the book.

Finally the day of the debate rolled around and she was a little late. The kids were getting restless and just as we were about to start without her, her incredibly expensive car pulled up and she...well, she made her entrance into the classroom. I never saw anything like it.

First to come through the door was a meticulously groomed, snow white Afghan. This was no junkyard dog, rather it was a real nose-in-the-air aristocrat, executing a slow, deliberate...dare I say "regal" walk...the kind of animal you feel you feel compelled to bow down to.

Next through the door were the links of a dazzling silver dog chain and at the end of that chain was revealed....I kid you not....a stiletto-heeled Barbarian Princess right out of Frank Frazetta.

Yes, it was the same good-looking girl I shared the accident with but here she was dressed to the nines with long, snow white hair tied back in a pony tail, and big, silver hoops dangling from her ears. Everything she wore was snow white: snow white Capri pants, a tight snow white fuzzy sweater, and snow white high heels.

The kids' jaws dropped, especially the boys'.

The girls were flabbergasted.

I was afraid to look at the teacher. She was probably as speechless as the rest of us. 

Trying to overcome the shock, I outlined for the kids the form the debate would take. The format was that the kids should sit in their seats til they formulated an opinion then, when they decided what they believed, they should get up and stand on the side of the room closest to the speaker they agreed with.  If they changed their opinion in mid-debate they should walk over to the other side, and half way through we'd invite them  into the argument.

The Barbarian Princess went first, and she barely said five words in a throaty Marilyn Monroe voice before the entire class got up and walked to her side of the room. If it had been a boat we'd have capsized.

Her argument in favor of the book consisted of saying over and over that it was cute.  The whole class nodded in agreement, as if it was the most deeply profound thing they ever heard. When I spoke the kids rolled up their eyes in disdain.  When the princess made a joke the class laughed and laughed uproariously. When I made a joke there was only silence.

Eventually a nerdy girl with oversize glasses went over to my side but that's all I got.  The princess was declared the winner with a rousing cheer and I was given "Are-you-still-here?" glances.

Well, that's life.

PIERRE ETAIX: GENIUS

American readers won't recognize the name Pierre Etaix. TOO BAD! The man was one of the greatest of all French filmmakers and exerted a big influence on American comedy people like Jerry Lewis and Ernie Kovacs.  But don't take my word for it: watch his Academy Award winning short "Happy Anniversary" (above), co-written (with Jean-Claude Carriere), directed and performed by Etaix. If you make film for a living, you'll find a lot to study here.

Unfortunately the YouTube copies of the two films I'm talking about suck and give a false impression of the pace and atmosphere in the story. Etaix's films suffer more than most from reduction and bad sound. Be sure to watch them as large as you can.



See what you think of this clip (above) from his 1965 feature called "Yo-Yo." The precision, the way lighting and staging enhance the humor, the way one gag morphs into another, the way sound effects are used...it's a textbook of technique.

Once again, watch the film in the largest size possible.

Etaix (above) is still very much alive, and age hasn't hurt him a bit, not in the face anyway. In his retirement years Etaix (above) has one of the kindest faces I've seen.

Here's Etaix with his good friend, Jerry Lewis. There's some similarity in the best of their films. You have to wonder, who influenced who?  My guess is that Etaix influenced Jerry which, if it's true, doesn't diminish Jerry a bit. Even Shakespeare had influences.

BTW: Many thanks to Steve Worth for introducing me to these films! If you live in LA and would like to see good prints of these this weekend then contact The Creative League via Steve's site: http://animationresources.org/

SOME FAVORITE VIDEOS

Here are a few of the videos I've been watching this week.The first two appear on this site for the first time, the final four or five are repeats that richly reward a second viewing.

First (above) is the dog pee gag from Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's "Hound of the Baskervilles." Mike turned me on to this. He said the film is terrible but contains one sequence that's fall-on-the-floor funny...and he was right. See what you think.



Here's Richard Burton (above) as the libidinous poet in Terry Southern's film, "Candy." I'm not really a fan of that film but the windblown scarf sequence is not to be missed.



Above, Peter Cook and Dudley Moore parody TV puppet shows.



Here (above) Peter Sellers mocks Lawrence Olivier.



Fry and Laurie (above). Geez, I miss that show.


Here's (above) Monty Python in Romanian.



I'll end with a quick sketch about two Shakespearean actors ordering a meal in a restaurant. It's only a minute long, but it might take a couple of minutes to cue it up...sorry about that. The part of the video I'm calling attention to starts at 6:30 and ends at 7:33.