Wednesday, April 17, 2013


"Hi! Uncle Eddie here! I just left Trader Joe's. I thought I'd stop for coffee on the way home and chat about the food I just got. I can only talk for a few minutes, though. I have frozen food in the car.

"What the heck!?"

"Oh, that's an endless loop of Kate Upton. She's the new spokesman for Carl Jr's. They're trying to change their image."

"Anyway...the food! The big news is a Trader Joe's frozen TV dinner called Chicken Tikka Masala. Don't dismiss it just because it's a TV dinner. It's just as good as the Tikka Masalas you'd get at an Indian restaurant, and beats the Masalas you buy in jars by a mile. Eat it with Trader Joe's Whole Wheat Naan. Their naan isn't exactly authentic, but it's still pretty good. "

"The only problem is, the Masala's portions are a bit on the skimpy side. It's kinda pricey considering how little you get."

"I thought about making it myself, using the contents list on the box as a guide, but that might not work. In India they use fresh spices and let them simmer all day long. When they cook a meal, they're primarily cooking the spices...the rest is just an afterthought. You might need a knack to do that."

"Next on the agenda is another indian dish, "Punjab Choley." Man, that's good! I've had it every few weeks for a year now and I've never gotten tired of it. Not only that, it's only two bucks a box. What a deal!"

"I was about to say that it's just as good as restaurant choley, but I think it IS restaurant choley. I'll bet restaurants have mountains of those boxes in the back. They just open up the pre-cooked packets like I do and microwave them."

'"Hmmm, is there anything else? Maybe I better throw in a negative review so I don't look like I'm on the take from Trader Joe's."

"Well, the TJ kimchi was only so-so. A Korean friend got mad at me for even daring to buy the store-bought kind. Boy, Koreans take their kimchi VERY seriously. They think it has mystical properties. I wouldn't be surprised if they try to raise the dead with it."

"Okay, I'm outta here."

"Wow, an interesting ad!"


Sarah Renae said...

Alton Brown has a recipe for Lamb Tikka Masala. link

Roberto Severino said...

Yummy and funny! Just how I like your photo stories.

Jennifer said...

Trader Joe's rocks the house! They have so many high-quality items for reasonable prices. You just can't beat them. Every time I'm in Pittsburgh or Washington DC, I always stop at TJ's on my way back home (in wild West Virginia). I'd love for them to open a TJs in WV - I can't get the two-buck Chuck in the PA store (which is closer to me) because of their liquor laws.

I can't get over how much Kate Upton looks like Anna Nicole Smith in those ads.

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Jennifer: True enough about TJ's! Too bad about the Pennsylvania liquor laws. TJ's has some interesting beers and wines. I like "Arrogant Bastard Ale" with its label that says you should put the bottle back because you're not good enough to drink what's inside.

Sarah: Wow! Thanks for the tip about Alton Brown. I'll look it up. Trader Joe's has a frozen version of that lamb masala which I've avoided up til now because I was afraid it would disappoint and ruin my memory of the chicken masala, but now that I've seen that thought written down it strikes me as silly. I'll try it next time I'm at TJ's.

Roberto: Haw!

pappy d said...

Those Kate Upton ads are a study in temptation. Hot girl & greasy burger are a glaring contradiction but together they represent perfect contentment. You can't imagine her eating it. The burger is just for you, and so is the sexy supermodel who really digs fat guys! I give Paris Hilton fantasy-credit for "washing my cool car" as well, but the spot went off-message when she put that greasy fantasy
in her mouth. Looking at her, I could never believe she was the sort of girl who swallows.

Anonymous said...

Eddie, Don't you live in Southern California? What's with the parka? Last year in Los Angeles the lowest temp was in the high forties. That's skinny dippin' weather here in the Mid Atlantic states. Mike

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Anon: Haw! I like that jacket so much that I'll go into withdrawl when it gets too hot to wear it. I got it from a thrift store that sells clothing used in Hollywood films. This jacket was from an Adam Sandler movie. It has such a nice vibe!

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Pappy: Haw!