HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEARTS

UNCLE EDDIE: "Amanda!!!! It's so good to see you again!



UNCLE EDDIE: "Waiter! Get this girl anything she wants! It's on me!"

"Amanda, you should try the lobster, it's really good here! And for wine, try the Cuvee Royale. It's pricey, but it's worth it!"



AMANDA: "It's good to see you too, Eddie. It's been a long time."




UNCLE EDDIE: "Yeah, we were high school sweethearts, remember? Amanda and Eddie; Eddie and Amanda! We were inseperable."



AMANDA: "Those were the days alright! I remember you used to draw a lot."



UNCLE EDDIE: "Yeah, I became a cartoonist! I moved to LA, and got into the animation industry...I have a family now, and two kids...life's been good! How about you!?



AMANDA: "Oh, a little bit of this and a little bit of that. I think about you a lot."




UNCLE EDDIE: "Me!? You think about ME!!? Awww, that's sweet."




AMANDA: "Yeah, I think about you all the time. That's why I wanted to have lunch with you. There's something I've always wanted to show you...something...awfully... private..."




UNCLE EDDIE: "(Gulp!) Show me? Private????"



AMANDA: "Yeah, it's the gap on my record shelf where my Phil Collins records used to be! Rmemember I lent them to you? What did you do with them? I could get a good price for them now."



UNCLE EDDIE: "Phil Collins?



UNCLE EDDIE: "...Um, you said Phil collins, right?"



UNCLE EDDIE: "Well, um...let's see now...you moved away and...OK, now I remember! Yeah, I had those records on the shelf for years."



UNCLE EDDIE: "Finally I just gave them away. I mean they were Phil Collins records, for Pete's sake! Even the Salvation Army wouldn't take them! The guy kicked me out of the store."



AMANDA: "You gave them away? That's men for you! Not an ounce of consideration."



UNCLE EDDIE: "But...but... they were Phil Collins records..."



AMANDA: "Men are such beasts."



UNCLE EDDIE: "Don't worry! I'll look for them on eBay! You'll get them back, I promise! Look, it's getting late. I'm really sorry, but I gotta go."




UNCLE EDDIE: "Waiter! Get this girl anything she wants!!! It's on me!

(Eddie To Amanda) "You gotta try the grilled cheese sandwich here! And don't miss the tap water! It's to die for! Well, I gotta go now!"

THE BOYFRIEND STORY

Kali: "Oh, Eddie! It's so wonderful to be here with you!"

Uncle Eddie: "Yeah, just the two of us, all alone."

Kali: "Alone? Um, Eddie...the thing about us being alone..."

Uncle Eddie: "Yes, Sweetums? Dove pie? Sugar eyes? "

Kali: "Well, I...um... have problems with an ex-boyfriend. He follows me everywhere! It's not my fault! I can't get rid of him!"

Uncle Eddie: "Boyfriend? You mean that goofy guy with the square glasses?"




Uncle Eddie: "Haw, Haw! Boy, Kali, you sure can pick 'em! You leave him to me! I might have to rough him up a little, but I won't hurt him too bad!"






Kali: "I'm...er... glad you feel that way, Eddie..."



Uncle Eddie: "Huh!?"



Uncle Eddie: "Glack!"

Boyfriend: "Who's your friend Kali?"

Boyfriend: "Ya like that coke? It's a good coke, isn't it? Nice and cold?"

Uncle Eddie: "The coke? Well, uh...yeah...it's my favorite...

(CRUSH!!!!!)

Uncle Eddie: "Well, I've gotta go now! But first I have to tell you Sir, that I'm impressed, yes, impressed with what a lovely couple you make! Call me old-fashioned but I believe the very heart and soul of the country depends on the eternal bonds made by lovebirds like yourselves! Blessings upon you, Sir! Blessings!"

Uncle eddie: "Be seeing ya!"

Uncle Eddie: (Whistles)

All pictures stolen from Nico's site, cited below! Thanks, Nico! Be sure to take a look at Nico and Kali's version of this! Those links are also below. Thanks to Jorge I reinstated the cup-crushing sequence that my computer wouldn't let me put up originally. Cup-crushing is a beautiful thing!