IT WAS A DARK AND STORMY NIGHT.......
SFX: (Knock! Knock! Knock!)
Man: "Hold your horses! I'm coming, I'm coming! Who is it? Whaddaya want!?"
Man: "Oh, a trick or treater! Is it that time of year already? Hmmm. Well come in! Come in!"
Man: "Have a seat! Oh, you'd rather sit over there? Wouldn't you rather...but that's that's alright. Sit wherever you want."
Man: "That was my wife's chair before...before... the accident."
Man: "Actually she was just my last wife. I've had five. They all had...er, accidents. Heh, I guess the house is unlucky."
SFX: Lightning
Man: "Now I know you probably want some candy! Of course you do, you're a kid Well, you're gonna get some! Yesireee!"
Man: "Mildred! Are you listening up there in heaven!? I wanna give this nice kid some candy! Now don't disagree! I promised her candy and I'm gonna give it to her!'
Man: "Huh!? What's that? Candy's too good to give away!? But what about the little kid? What does she get? "
Man: "Oh no! (Gasp!) Not that! It's too gruesome!"
Man: Oh well, whatever you say, dear!
Man: "Now see what happens, kid? You got me all upset. I need to relax. Let's smoke a pen. That always makes me feel better."
Man: ""Ah, a Bic! Bics smoke better than Parkers. It's a better grade of plastic!"
Man: "My first wife used to smoke pens with me."
Man: "Actually, you remind me of her."
SFX: Lightning again.
Man: "How 'bout some bread and butter?"
SFX: Knock! Knock! Knock!
Man: "Huh? Oh, it's more trick or treaters!
Man: "We'll have that bread & butter some other time. You look kind of anxious to leave, anyway."
Man: "By now! See ya later! Don't run too fast!"
Man: "Haw,haw,haw,haw! The old psycho trick always works! Now I have all the candy for myself!"
Photographs by Kali Fontechio
23 comments:
yes they are XDD
that was funny
i think your face should be drawn and studied, along with the top cat toy everyone's trying to do. i mean that in a good way!
great expressions as always, eddie.
i wish there was some theory corner cartoon on this blog. at least some flash cartoon or something.
or an uncle eddie figurine? face masks?
Boy, this turned out to be genuinely creepy! Well, that's what Halloween is all about!
I am reminded of a story a few years back in the Chicago Tribune about a suburban haunted house where one of the ghouls was accused of groping girls in the dark. I couldn't help but think, "Well, that's pretty scary, isn't it?" You don't usually get your money's worth like that.
Uncle Eddie's finally lost it folks.
..and i think i like it!!!!!
thanks for the Hallowe'en story eddie! spooktacular!
That's an instant Halloween classic. Great stuff, Eddie!
I like how you used an old 1970's background set in the photos with you. The fake wood paneled walls was an especially nice creepy touch. I could practically smell that attic-like mildewy smell just like my grandmas house when I was a kid.
Just kiddin... but it did remind me of that. That was some pretty funny stuff. More, more!!
Gosh, I would never have though good old uncle eddie cabable of being so CREEPY. It's never the ones you suspect...
Smoking a pen ! LOL ! Eddie you're too much !
Hahaha!!!!
John's house has never looked so creepy! ...I'm gonna go smoke a bic now.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! The ending was classic. Why isn't the New Yorker, or even MAD Magazine begging you to write for them?
BTW, in the last picture, what kind of candy is that? Is that a regional candy available in the West Coast?
Yay! You're creepy Eddie!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
The lightning striking right after the "Actually you remind me of her" close-up is perfect!
The knife shots are sooooo creepy! :S I like it!
I actually laughed out loud at some of the facial expressions, and the sheer absurdity of the story.
On another note- at a local antiquarian bookshop they've got some 19th century punch almanacs and a 1934 mickey mouse annual- should I pick them up to study?
Kali: Thanks for the great pictures! You have knack with a camera, no doubt about it!
Everybody: Yeah, those expressions are creepy, aren't they? They even creeped me out!
Let's face it, when you get to a certain age your face morhs into something that's perfect for horror films. You can look sly and evil even when you're thinking about your grocery list.
Norman: Holy Cow, you're right! The toys make it even scarier!
Jennifer: Whew! I was afraid you'd think I was really evil and stop coming here!
I don't know where the candy comes from. I got it off the internet. That's not my hand.
Callum: Nobody but you can decide that. My own opinion is that there are about five dozen art books that are must-haves and the rest you can get from the library and the net. Every posession you have is a millstone around your neck when you have to move.
Kirk Douglas is no longer the world's coolest living actor!
Eddie, this picure set made me snort, giggle, and guffaw. Your face is so cartoonish, it's amazing.
In fact, I did a few simple marker drawings of your beatific visage, but I think they are very silly so I don't want to share them on my blog until I gauge your reaction. Do you have an email address I could send them to? If you would rather not share here, you can email me at kellytoonart@gmail.com
Funny stuff.
Because of your expressions, you look like eleven different people. That's incredible! Nice ending, too.
Oh for Pete's sake! That was a funny resolution. and you generated some really nice tension. Nice job to you and Kali.
Eddie your comment about moving and having possessions is intriguing. Any chance a post on the subject of the animator's gypsy like existence? I bet a statesman of your order would have much to say about the cartoonist's knack for acquiring things.
Oh forgot some of my patented Halloween Theory.
Fun sized candies are a joke! I give kids bars of Hersheys. Not king sized madness, but nice regular full bars of America's best form of diplomacy... the Hershey bar!
Leave your lights on this year and give generously to the crazy kids! Accept any of them dressed as characters from Cars.
Boil them in oil.
Kelly: I got your drawings but I might be the best part of a day before I can respond.
Mike: Thanks!
Micah: An excellent idea for a post! I'll write it down!
And this is hilarious! :-D.
HAHHhHHhHhhHHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA. I just got back from work and I finally get to read your latest posts. Is this what happens when I'm gone for too long? XD
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