Tuesday, August 18, 2009


JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Hi, Mr. Potter. Did you want to see me about something?"

MR. POTTER: "About something? Why heavens no, boy! Do two friends who've known each other as long as we have, need an excuse to talk? Have a seat! Take a load off your feet!"

MR. POTTER: "I want to introduce you to my brother, Ebeneezer..."

MR. POTTER (V.O.): "...and my other brother, Samuel. My brothers and I are partners in the company."

JIMNEY STEWBALL: " 'Pleasure ta meet cha'."

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Look, Mr. Potter....If you have something to say I think it's best just to spit it out."

MR. POTTER: "Spit it out? You do have a way of getting to the point, don't you Jimney? Okay, let's see what we have here."

MR. POTTER: "Why, it's a private detective's report, and look...it's about you."

MR. POTTER: "It says that you've acquired debts that led you to borrow from your own Savings and Loan!"

MR. POTTER: "Oooo...borrowing from your own company's funds. Conflict of interest. That's naughty."

SAMUEL: "Let's be frank, Mr. Stewball. You have a narcissistic wife who requires enormous quantities of fancy clothing every month, do you not?"

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Well I wouldn't exactly say...I mean not every...well...well, er, maybe."

INSERT OF JIMNEY'S WIFE: (She kisses herself repeatedly).

(Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!)

EBENEEZER: "And a senile mother-n-law who's always being fined for running around the neighborhood naked?"


JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Yeeeaaah...Gee, I wish she wouldn't do that."

MR. POTTER: "(Sniff!) I sympathize with you. I know you're honest. It says here that you've paid back most of the money already."

MR. POTTER (CONT): "Even so, as a stockholder I could have you arrested. Not that I would, of course."

MR. POTTER: (Slams the table): "BUT I SHOULD!!! You're not a responsible business man!!!!"

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Well, Mr. Potter...I did build houses for twenty families last year."

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Some of them had trouble meeting the payments, and I took up the slack with my own money. That meant I had to borrow to pay for all the fancy dresses and nudist fines."

MR. POTTER: "I know, I know. You don't have to explain anything to me, Jimney. Just sign this bill of sale and your debts will be a thing of the past. Of course I'll foreclose on all those dirty clients of yours who work with their hands, but what do you care?"

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "What do I care? My father worked with his hands, and his father before him."

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Doggone it, Mr. Potter! Ya sit there in your fancy chair, and ya think you're better than everybody else. Well, you're not!"

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "In the vast scheme of things, you're just an insignificant..."

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "An insignificant..."

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Just a...just a....."

MR. POTTER: "Calm down, Jimney! Calm down! You haven't heard the rest of the offer! We'll take care of your family for you."


SAMUEL: "Yes, your wife and mother-in-law would be removed to an impossibly remote cannibal island. Everyone runs around naked there, so your mother-in-law wouldn't mind."

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "But...but what about my wife?"

EBENEEZER: "The first foreigner they've ever seen. She'll be worshipped as a god. It's every narcissist's dream."

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Yeah...yeah, it is kind of, isn't it?"

JIMNEY STEWBALL: "Okay, where do I sign?"

All the parts in this parody played by me, Eddie fitzgerald. I just wanted to see if I could play old man parts.


Stefan said...

Please, never stop posting those photo-stories! This one really made my day :-)

Greetings from Germany,

mike f. said...

Great, but you forgot the stutter.

Tony DiStefano said...

Uncle Eddie, your exspressions alone would make you one of the greatest charactor actors that ever lived. I can see you playing scrooge.Who are you? are you an actor? writer? I know your connected to John K.It seems like you have so many great comedians of the past rolled into one.Thanks for this blog .It brightens the day.

Trevor Thompson said...

Nice one, Eddie!

I really love these stories! Is it faster for you to act these out in front of a camera than it would be to draw them?

Or do you do them this way because it's simply more fun to dress up and act?

Either way, I love it!

- trevor.

Trevor Thompson said...

PS: Who's the girl that kisses herself?

Jennifer said...


Anonymous said...

Is that the "wrinkle jacket?"


The Jerk said...

this is great. reading this one, I couldn't resist trying to put voices to the story, inserting my own mediocre impressions of stewart and barrymore, and timing the pictures to the audio. unless you object, I'd like to share the results with you...


naturally, if you decide you want it removed lemme know, and i'll gladly do so.

Niki said...

Everybody runs around naked there! funny!

Deniseletter said...

Hahahahaha This was a terrific characterization with funny and original story!
Impressive how can you do that with few resources.The fun house mirror effect gives some of them, reminds me Don Martin's style

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Stephan, Mike, jennifer: Thanks for the kind words!

Tony: Thanks much! I'm a storyboard artist in TV animation!

Trevor: I did this story because I wanted to see what it would be like to act the part of an old man, and because I wanted to get a deeper understanding of how the classic sequence in the Frank Capra film was constructed.

Believe it or not, I learn an awful lot when I write and act in parodies like this one. I'm dying to tackle the class assignment I talked about in the melodrama post. It's not my kind of writing so it would be hard, but I'd learn a lot, even if I blew it.

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Cybthia: Wow! You have a good eye! Yes, that was the wrinkle jacket. It's my most versatile jacket!

Denise: Thanks! It's amazing how the right kind of writing can distract from primitive technique!

Jerk: Holy Cow! I'm flattered! Thanks for doing that!

Niki: Many thanks!

pappy d said...

It's a wonderful post!
Thanks, Eddie. You made my day.

Anonymous said...

"It's A Wonderful Life" is so strong a story it can take any amount of parody and still hold up. Frank Capra said of it late in his life, "There is something in that film that I didn't put there!"

S.B. said...

This is, by far, my favorite of your photo-stories!

gillian said...

Great photos. I can't help but smile and laugh as I look at your pictures one by one. Now, I do feel how wonderful life really is. Womens fashion