"THE SMOKER" (EPISODE 7)

ANNOUNCER:  "Yes, it's THE SMOKER, and a smoker knows many things! Through the wisps of tobacco smoke he sees truth and error...and MURDER!"

ANNOUNCER: "In tonight's episode we find THE SMOKER skulking through the dark corridors of the abandoned farm house. If he's lucky, he'll find the kidnapped girl. If he's not lucky....."

 






THE SMOKER:  "Who are you? Where's your body? I don't see a body!"

DR. SWEET: "I am Dr. Sweet. I don't have a body any more, but I get along alright..."

DR. SWEET: "...with a little help from my friends."

THE SMOKER:  "Glad to meet ya! What a fine bunch of fellows, yessir!"

THE SMOKER:  "Look, I'm not a cop! Somebody pays me and I do this stuff.  I don't know why you took the girl, and I don't care. "


SMOKER: " Let me take her with me now and we'll call this square.

DR. SWEET: "Square? You'll call it 'square?' That's very funny! He'll call it square! (Laughs)"





MAN CREATURES: (They laugh)

(The laughter becomes a cacophony)

THE SMOKER: "Stop it! Tell them to stop it!"

DR. SWEET: "Stop."

THE SMOKER:  "Look, I got $500 here. That was my down payment for getting the girl."

 
THE SMOKER:  "Let me walk out of here with her now, and it's all yours. You better make up your mind fast, though, before I change my mind."

THE SMOKER: "No? Are you sure? Gee, that's too bad......then, how about............"

THE SMOKER:  "....How about THIS!!!???" Get the girl NOW! We're leaving!!!!!"

DR. SWEET: "Oh you're leaving?"

 
DR. SWEET: "Did you hear that? We just met and now he's leaving! Maybe we can persuade him to stay a little longer!"

(The creatures go ballistic! Lots of growls and howls as they go on the attack!)

ANNOUNCER:  "What's going to happen to THE SMOKER!?  Where is the kidnapped girl? Who is Dr. Sweet!? How can he survive without a body? Why are his henchmen hideously deformed? Find out next week when we again present another exciting episode of...'THE SMOKER!' "

"OUT OF THE INK BOTTLE"

MIX FLEISCHMAN:  "Hmmmm.  I can't think of anything to draw."

MIX FLEISCHMAN:  "Wait a minute! Why didn't I think of it before!? I'll let my friend KaKa the Clown out of the ink bottle! He's always good for a laugh!"

MIX FLEISCHMAN: "Let's see......"

SLAM!

MIX FLEISCHMAN:  "Oops! Sorry, KaKa! Tell you what: I feel so bad about dropping you, that I'll let you stay out this time! I mean stay out for good! You're a free man!"

MIX FLEISCHMAN: "So what are you going to with your freedom?"

KAKA:  "You mean me, Mr. Fleischman?"

MIX FLEISCHMAN:  "Yeah, KaKa, what are your plans?"

KAKA: "Well, Gosh Mr. Fleischman, I hope you won't laugh at me.  You see, I've always wanted to get an education...to make something out of myself."

KAKA (CONT):  "First I'd like to get a liberal arts degree with a major in Theater. Then I'd like to see if one of the big New york acting schools will accept me."

MIX FLEISCHMAN: "Wow, that's very commendable, KaKa!  It sounds like a lot of work, though. Do you think you can handle it?"

KAKA:  "Gee Whiz, Mr. Fleischman...I hope so.  Of course I have to support my mother while I work my way through school, and then there's my church activities, but I figure that if I'm thrifty and work hard then everything will work out alright. "

MIX FLEISCHMAN: "Boy, it sounds like you won't have much time for socializing."

KAKA:  "Socializing!? Gee, Mr. Fleischman, I won't have time to make friends.  'Gotta crack those textbooks every night!"

MIX FLEISCHMAN:  "I can help you there, KaKa. What you need is a ready-made friend."

MIX FLEISCHMAN:  "KaKa, meet my pal, Betty Bloop!"

KAKA:  "Betty BlooP?...Um, Er....Hi, I guess. Whatever."

KAKA: (Gasp!)

KAKA:  "Wha...wha...what is that...that thing with long hair and BUMPS on its chest?"

MIX FLEISCHMAN:  "Oh, I forgot to tell you. That's a girl. Half the world is girls. "


MIX FLEISCHMAN (V.O.):  "Come to think of it, a serious student like you won't have time for girls.  There's plenty of time for......"



MIX FLEISCHMAN:  "KaKa, you're not listening!  What about school?"


KAKA: "School? What school?"