A NEW CARICATURE!

Boy, you have to have thick skin to be a caricature subject for John! Here I am on a restaurant napkin, sharing the space with a starfish, a screaming girl, and a puppet profile.

If you're curious to see what doodles were on the other side, then here you go!

ANOTHER "MY DINNER WITH ANDRE" (ACTUALLY JOHN K)

Today we met again at "The Bear Pit," a local sawdust-on-the-floor barbecue restaurant with Preston Blair - style paintings all around the walls. When I came in John was reading The National Enquirer, which is essential reading for cartoonists since it contains all the necessary info about what stars have cellulite. Orders were placed and the conversation commenced.

We began with a fascinating discussion of Scribner but that'll require a lot of pictures to explain, so I'll save it for last.

After Scribner we talked for a bit about how old I look in those photo essay pictures I took. Maybe anticipating an outpouring of self-pity, John kindly said I didn't look that old in real life, but really, that wasn't necessary. I explained that I'd reached an advanced philosophical level where I was beyond worldly concerns like screamingly grotesque wrinkles. People at my elevated level laugh at people who worry about things like that. "Ha!", we say, "Ha!"

Then we talked for a while about what tragic creatures men are. Poor men spend their whole lives chasing after sex and get only a fraction of what they need. John said that's why men have to go to war, because somebody has to be made to pay for our frustration at not being able to have a harem.

Talking about sex brought us around to Tex Avery, maybe the most heterosexual director of the color cartoon era. We both agreed that after Clampett, Tex was the greatest cartoon director. Jones ranks third, which is still a very high position.

Jones was all about telling linear stories in a humorous, well-executed and professional manner. Clampett was a creature of the big band and jitterbug era, and also of the golden age of radio and live-action film comedy. He swam in media. He had street smarts, charisma and almost unfailing intuition. In John's words, he made cartoons an "experience."

Somehow (?) this digressed into a discussion of Tim Russert (spelled right?), the TV news commentator. Russert used to be a rock & roll promoter and he still looks like someone who could tell a good dirty joke. You have to admire the guy for his ability to re-invent himself as a news commentator. Here's (above) a napkin drawing John did of him. I like the Thurber arms and serious expression.

Here's (above) what we talked about most of the time. John's been telling me that the new Warner set contains a break-through print of Clampett's "Eatin' on the Cuff." He said the amazing clarity of the print allows us to see never-before-seen (by this generation) nuances in the cartooning and animation, and that this necessitates a re-evaluation of the film as one of Clampett's best. He makes the case in a wonderful post that's on his site now:

http://www.johnkstuff.blogspot.com/

I'd already read the blog and I had to admit that John was right. Take a look at these Scribner drawings. The happy energy, the love of cartooning, the inventive poses, the beautiful proportions and attention to detail are awe-inspiring! I love the wrinkled sleeves...who said you can't animate wrinkled clothing? The black and white values are handled so well that you don't even miss the color.

Notice that the girl looks feminine and funny at the same time. Scribner was able to do both! After seeing this it's going to be hard to go back to seeing cartoon girls that are only one or the other.

Here the Veronica Lake spider shows off her glorious schnoz. Note the big hands and big eyes. My favorite cartoon characters usually have big hands and eyes. That's what you make expressions with. In my world only secondary characters have small hands and small eyes.

Here's (above) a wonderful example of Scribner cartooning. It's just a back shot, yet it leaves me breathless! The hair and large lower body are hilarious and the size and orientation of the legs are inspired!


You can say that real girls don't look like that, but are you sure? I see girls (above) who are a bit like that all the time.

Anyway, I digress. We talked endlessly about Scribner and spent some time trying to figure out why Clampett, who was very prolific in his black and white period, turned out fewer cartoons a year in his color period. Maybe he was busy developing his own projects on the side, maybe good work requires more time. We could only guess.

Anyway, the conversation eventually ran out of gas and we found ourselves out in the blinding sunlight of the parking lot, ready to face another day!

THINKING ABOUT ART SCHOOL

BEFORE YOU START TO READ RUN, DON'T WALK, TO JOHN KRICFALUSI'S SITE WHERE HE TALKS ABOUT HIS IDEAL ART CURRICULUM FOR ANIMATORS. IT'S SIMPLY THE BEST THINKING ON THE SUBJECT THAT I'VE EVER SEEN IN PRINT!


What I'll try to do here is put down a few thoughts on the state of art schools in general (which includes traditional colleges offering an animation/art program) and animation courses in particular. The biggest recent change in animation curriculums is that they're almost all computer-centered. Every school wants to be known as cutting edge, preparing students for the jobs of the future and all that. As a consequence drawing courses have diminished in importance and now you can graduate from art school without being able to draw or paint. That's an historic change! Imagine that! The practice of hundreds of years reversed in my own time! How did such a big change come about?



Well, the computer obsession is the obvious first answer. That's odd because the favored animation of art students -- what they watch for recreation and inspiration when they're not being forced -- is anime, which is 2D. Students seldom watch 3D for fun unless its video game graphics. You get the feeling that they don't really like 3D all that much but they're persuaded that learning it is the only way they'll get a job. Is that true? Who gave them that impression?

The obvious answer is, "The box office told them! 3D is the only animation that makes money!," but is that true? 3D has been in TV animation for well over a decade now and what are the most popular animated programs? The answer is "The Simpsons," "South Park" and "Family Guy," all 2D. OK, south Park is computer animated, but it's deliberately made to look like it's not. No computer TV that looks like computer TV has been a prime-time hit. 3D has beaten 2D at the cinema box office but what was the competition? "Treasure Planet?" "Home on the Range?" These are executive-driven films are not at all what I would call fair competition.

My own guess is that high school teachers and art schools turned things around; high school teachers because they scared their students to death with the "college-or-scrub-toilets-for-a-living" rhetoric, and art schools because they took in so many non-artists that the foxes are beginning to rule the hen house.

The upshot of this irresponsible advice in high school was that every student who wasn't academically inclined went on a frantic search for colleges that offered easy degrees...and what college is easier to graduate from than an art college? In unprecedented numbers non-artists flooded art schools and they were backed up by big, tax-payer-backed student loans, so they were not turned away. How will these students pay back those loans? Remember when art schools had strict entrance requirements?

The influx of non-artists into art school is changing the nature of art school. A lot of students don't feel comfortable with traditional art and are much relieved when they can bail out into computers. Very often non-artists run art schools and they tend to repeat the non-artist mantra: "Everything will be computers right around the corner." That's only a half truth. 3D certainly is the future of animation but good animation programs are not by a long shot right around the corner.

Present-day 3D programs like Maya are clunky and unresponsive and there's no relief in sight. Art schools should be preparing students for a longer transition period but instead they're putting all their eggs in one futuristic basket. Maybe that's because 60s-type people run the schools and that generation was obsessed with what used to be called the "generation gap." They watched their parents lapse into irrelevance and they learned the lesson... on pain of death don't fall behind the trends. Unfortunately for them the anticipated trend in 3D was slow in coming. Today, all these years after "Tron," 3D animation is still expensive, insensitive to cartooning and expressive acting, has difficulty creating appealing characters, and is hard to use.

Even so, the fantasies of non-artists about how art should be done can't be ignored. They're training the next generation of artists and that'll have its effect. We still have to meet the challenge of anime, which is the immediate threat on the horizon, and that battle will likely be fought with 2D. My advice to young animators is to learn how to draw, cartoon and animate effectively, in addition to whatever computer skills you can pick up. If John K ever starts a school then kill to get into it. That's the real article. One day 3D will be as easy to use and creatively useful as a common pencil, and we'll all wonder how we got along without it....but we're far from being there now.

By the way, my own experience with art school management has been the opposite of what I've described here. Everybody I've worked for has been an artist, sometimes really good ones. Good art schools with competent and idealistic managers do exist and they're worth seeking out.

MY DINNER WITH ANDRE (JOHN K) PART#3

We met at noon at the local Italian restaurant. John ordered Chicken Calizonne, which was good, but didn't have a bit of chicken in it. Boy, John doesn't have much luck with restaurants! Anyway, the conversation commenced.

We got to talking about the 70s when even white people wore afros. It was the age of Superfly!

Black guys' apartments of that era were always, with almost no exception, decorated with black leather and chrome. They're not like that now, but in those days it was mandatory.

All the rooms were like that, and they were spotless. You could eat off the floor! No clutter like in my house. Nothing but furniture and walls and vast amounts of empty space.

Invariably the pictures on the walls were cloth prints, framed with chrome, The subject was always the same: naked black women with huge afros. I guess if you didn't have these you were shunned by other blacks.

We marveled at how many Superfly accessories you could buy in those days: afro salt shakers, afro lamps, clippers to give your dog an afro...you could put an afro on anything and people would buy it! To make the point John drew some accessories of his own on his napkin, starting with the afro faucet (above).

Here's (above) the afro refrigerator and the afro parakeet with white double-pronged disco belt.

Then there's the afro pubic hair drawing which, in case kids are reading, I'll reproduce tiny. Anyway, John proved his point...anything can be embellished with an afro.

Another subject we hit was the shocking lack of facial expressions and body language in men. What's going on? Men are so stiff (you know what I mean)! They're like cigar store indians!

It's a point of honor among men to look as lifeless as possible. What gives?

Girls, on the other hand, seem to get more elastic every day. Guys, we're loosing the rubber war!

Well, there was more, but that's all I have time for. Once again we sighed, knowing the world would probably disregard what was expressed here this afternoon.

THE JOHN KRICFALUSI MANLY CARTOONIST BURGER

Sid: "You're here for the recipe, right? This burger's for cartoonists only...are you a cartoonist? Do you have I.D.? Hey, put the wallet back! I'm just kidding! OK, have a seat and listen up!

Uncle Eddie got this recipe directly from John K. and I got it directly from Uncle Eddie! This is the real McCoy, the world's manliest cartoonist burger."

Sid: "Start with lean ground beef...not the very leanest, you need a little fat...and an equal amount of ground angus and ground sirloin (That's 1/2 hamburger , 1/4 angus and 1/4 sirloin). Supermarkets keep these already ground and wrapped, right next to the ground beef.

Back at home it's important to have a Frankie Laine CD on while you're working. You can't make manly burgers unless you have manly music playing. And be sure it's the right Frankie Laine disc; the cuts "Wild Goose" and "Bowie Knife" are absolute necessities."

"OK, mix all the burger meats in a bowl, together with a raw egg. Add some spices. John uses chili powder, oregano and red and black pepper. No salt! Add some chopped onions. Mmmmm! Smells good already!

When you shape the paddies be sure they're a little bigger than the rolls you'll be using. Don't be stingy. The rolls, by the way, are bakery rolls with poppy or sesame seeds. "

"Now grill the burgers on the BBQ. Don't put the hood on, that's not the manly way. A real man allows the burgers to quick cook so they get crispy on the outside and mushy on the inside.

While the burgers are cooking you'll want to go back inside and fry some bacon and red and yellow peppers together. Mushrooms too, if you prefer. The bacon will give everything a great flavor. Make sure the bacon isn't over-cooked. You don't want it to be a burnt slab like the kind you get in restaurants. Take a taste. Aaaah!"

"Now turn the burgers over and put the cheese on top. No crummy American cheese, it has to be sharp cheddar or Swiss. Toast the rolls. When the paddie's cooked take it inside and heap on the bacon and peppers. Add some lettuce, maybe the deep green kind with the red tips. It has to be lettuce with flavor -- no iceberg! Serve it up with fresh, sliced onion rings. Put on the roll.

If you've done it right you should have a burger rich in flavor nuggets. As your teeth travel through the juicy little masterpiece you should experience a succession of textural delights. All it needs now is the right beer: LaBatt 50s or Pilsner Urquell if you can get hold of them."

"And there it is, The Manly Cartoonist's Burger. A meal fit for a king!

TWO KILLER JOHN CARICATURES

Here are a couple more caricatures that John did of me. When I think about the John drawings of me that I've posted up till now I'm amazed at how many ways there are to draw just one face. There's the optimistic me, the seedy me, the retarded me, the rat me, the eager me... it goes on. A number of the ways of thinking about me required John to try a different kind of line or a different design concept.

I don't post these drawings out of ego, because I'm the model. I do it so this aspect of what John does will get into the historical record and so that these techniques won't be lost. And since history is watching I'll cop to accidentally cutting off the final "D" in "dreaded."



Here's me in pantaloons and cod piece. I'm stupid-looking here so the "V" of the head in the disdain drawing is inverted so the wide part is on the bottom, as if my head is too stupid to resist gravity. I like the tiny soda under the soft, rubbery upper-lip flap. The five o'clock shadow looks like it's made of toothbrush bristles. Tiny granny glasses cover the seedy eyes and the long, thin spectacle arm extends all the way back to the hay-filled ear. Warts, of course.

I like the restraint involved in making the wart on the end of the nose tiny and understated. If it had been bigger it would have taken our attention away from the elegant, sloping line formed by the nose and forehead. This long, continuous line is the true focus of the picture.