Tuesday, March 13, 2007

APOLOGY TO MIKE

I just got a call from Mike Fontanelli who was very upset that my previous posts made me appear him appear lowbrow. Gee, I feel terrible. I certainly didn't mean to give offence. By way of making up for it I'd like to invite everyone here to a party in honor of Mike. It can be at my house or his house, whichever he prefers.

Directions to my house: park near the wall (above); don't worry about your car, the valet will take care of it.


You'll be met at the gate by my butler Bam Bam who will take you to the house on a scooter.


It's a small house. You won't have trouble finding your way around.


Here's my household staff clowning around with a neighbor. Feel free to ask for anything you want.

Why not take a dip in the pool? When you're finished you'll find helpful staffers ready to dry you off by giving you a group hug in their terry-cloth bikinis.


Maybe Mike will want to hold the party at his place! Directions: hang a right at the Bail Bond place and it's the last trailer on the left. Lock your door securely; you might want to leave a guard dog inside. Try not to step on anything rusty.


Have a seat anywhere. Mike isn't a stickler on formality.


Mike's maid will probably be there. Ask for anything you need. Mike is usually well-stocked with Pez but you might want to bring your own toilet paper.
Well, that's it! It makes me feel good inside that I can do a good deed for a friend!


25 comments:

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

(Sigh!) More typos! Typos are the bane of my existence!

Anonymous said...

mee two, Ediee. Mme 2.

Lester Hunt said...

Oooh! I hope Mike chooses to have it at his place. I'll bring a bag of Doritos!

Kali Fontecchio said...

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! I doubt he'll ever let you step foot inside his Soaky Toy Shanty ever again.

Kali Fontecchio said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ken Mitchroney said...

It would be funny if it wasn't so true.

applepwnz said...

Haha! The best part is the part about your butler Bam-bam (although I see neither the resemblance to a prehistoric boy or a skateboarder/prankster)

Shawn Dickinson said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Everybody: Actually Mike lives in a nice place and is an extremely generous and considerate host. Now I owe him another apology.

mike fontanelli said...

Just for THAT, you can wait OUTSIDE the trailer next time.
By the '68 Buick on the cinder blocks.

And no more PEZ for you!

Kali Fontecchio said...

I thought it would be appropriate to share my candid photos of Eddie's home:

Eddie's Humble Abode

Eddie's Mother

Kali Fontecchio said...

Eddie still lives with his mom. Ha, ha.

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Kali: My house! My Mom! You nailed us! It was hard growing up in such a small space and I frequently got splinters but now I'm a professional cartoonist and I can afford tweezers to pluck them out!

Sean Worsham said...

HAWR HAWR HAWR!!!!!!!!!! You F*ckin Rule EDDIE!!! xDDDD. KICK HIS ASS MIKE!!! (just kiddin of course).

Stephen Worth said...

Everyone's invited to a Bar-B-Cue at Mike's house!

See ya
Steve

Patrick McMicheal said...

This is a GREAT way to start my day @ work! FANTASTIC, I laughed my ass off "outloud" ,I might add!
I think I've been near Mikes house before, There's also an Adult book store, Lottery Agency, Check cashing and numerous Liquor stores! in the area! Oh, I almost forgot, Laundramats too.

Anonymous said...

pat mcmicheal, you just described 95% of L.A. county.

Eddie: you should have photoshopped your face into Hef's picture. The sight of a nonagenarian surrounded by a veritable quilt of girl flesh really brought me down.

Jennifer said...

Uncle Eddie, you are so wicked - look what you've started! You're going to get your wrists slapped for this... :D

I think the truth is the last picture of the manly-looking "maid" is actually Uncle Eddie's maid...

mike fontanelli said...

[Ken Mitchroney said...
It would be funny if it wasn't so true.]

Mitchroney, you old horse thief!! How the #%&*@ are you?

Matt Jones said...

I gotta say, Mike's pad looks like more fun!

Eddie Fitzgerald said...

Steve: LOL! That's hilarious! The size makes it even better!

Anonymous said...

HAHA!!

J. J. Hunsecker said...

A butler is a male servant, Eddie. A female servant would be a maid.

Anonymous said...

lol, J.J., I think Eddie's malapropism made it even funnier becaue I was expecting a bald British dude!

Unknown said...

Hey folks, I folowed a Delsarte trail to you all and I want to know who is studying his work out there. I am in New York and have been teaching his stuff to anyone who will listen for the last 9 years and researching him for 12. One of my dance students has been analyzing the expression in Disney animation according to Delsartean standards. Can any of you get in touch with me